Love?!?

Don’t play me another love song for I am not in love with love like I use to be. Cupid don’t throw me an arrow because I’m not quite ready to be in love with someone again. I mean don’t get me wrong the thought of being in love and having that constant feeling is beautiful, but when I really sit back and think about it; it’s really not so wonderful at all. There was a time when all I ever wanted was to be loved and be in that one relationship with the person I tried to make forever with. NOT! One turned into many and many made me tired of trying this LOVE thing with everyone. Love doesn’t always happen like that and every date wouldn’t always be my next potential mate. In a time where superficial and social media likes is more favorable and being in love with anyone other than self is the best love of all. I just don’t have time for the L-O-V-E like I use to. I just don’t want it right now.

So let me explain a little. Recently I had an encounter with an old flame and although the fire never sparked we were very much lukewarm for each other. I mean we had moments of flirting and all night texting, but we just could never get it together to be a great couple. I personally became cold and tired of trying. Well, now recently this person is making moves to be closer, stating their real feelings about me, and speaking as if we are in a relationship. Pause! Hold Up! Confused?! I’m not in love with being in love with you. Most times I don’t even like you, so why force something that has not possibility. The potential of loving you isn’t as exciting and something I was willing to try years ago. No more cat and mouse chase. I will no longer deal with the in and out; up and downs of your personal relationship with love or need to be love. Why do feelings change? Why do people suddenly change their minds and want to be in love when love wasn’t an option then. It’s too much and now I’m positively secure that I will try love when I believe love is worth trying once more.

I know my position of love not being for me right now makes some of you roll your eyes and think twice about me, but let’s be honest some of you feel the same way. Time to get real; how many unsuccessful relationships have you been in? How many of you are still in relationships that are going nowhere? Why are you consuming your life with love that brings more sorrow than it does gladness? Love is not supposed to be empty promises and false statements of “I Love You”. It’s as if love has become disposable and useless and a term that brings more doubts and excuses. The abuse we put on love. We throw it around and around without meaning and disregard how impactful those three little words are to someone who really does love, love.

We have to start beginning to love ourselves; dating ourselves to find out the true meaning of love. You can’t fully love someone else if you really don’t have a handle of who or what you are. Be very honest and unforgiving with yourself, so that you are prepared for the next relationship (if you are ready for that). At times we jump into love without really fully understanding what we really want out of love.

Try this: make a list of what you would love in a potential mate. Again being honest helps you see the image of the person you desire to be with. Describe every detail of that person and leave nothing to the imagination. After your list has been completed attach a prayer on finding that love and post it in a safe place. Include in your prayer the type of love you want to see. Sit back and watch God begin to work. Start to live as if that love is coming and prepare your life for someone new to enter. Being real; you may bump into a couple of “no ways” and “why me” dates on the way, but keep in mind that real love is on its way. It works, it’s a little secret I borrowed from “The Secret”.

Although my technique might be helpful and may bring true love it is absolutely best to be fully aware of you; being aware of your potential for love. Know if you have the tolerance for love. Some of us want love, but really don’t want all the work that comes with love. If the wanting and work doesn’t match you are NOT ready for love. That’s ok! Being aware is the beauty in making more conscious decisions about love. Before we engage in unwanted love, we must be sure to not mistake lust and like for love. You have to really want love for all the highs and lows that this four letter word will bring. Love isn’t temporary; its forever and before you want love know the love you want if your heart is ready to embrace that love. As for mOOdee I’m waiting for secure love and right now love and I have a lot of work to do before I put myself back into the arena to love again. Make sure you do the same and stop collecting all of cupid’s arrows.

Mood: I will be patient with love and start loving myself first!