Over the weekend I had the opportunity to chat with a trusted individual, someone regardless of what I think, he thinks, and we all think knows me better than 98% of those who label me “friend”. Moving on…..this person allowed me to vent about a situation; one that caused me to snap and move into a mood that would shake not only the table but grab that part of the body that separates the face from the shoulders. As I continued to press forward in my rant this person dropped a pearl of wisdom so beautiful that it silenced my thoughts and awoke something inside. This person simply said:
People aren’t interested in you. They like your company and the benefits of being connected to you.
WHOA! Connected to me? Not interested in me! That was deep. Who would have known that I would be receiving this gift on a day where all I wanted to do was engage in a text war and blocked this foolish homeboy. I never realized that people; those individuals who only call to eat or hit it to the beat were only there because of who I am. Not having a valued interest in my well-being or the real person inside, but only around because of their need for friendship and to match my cool. So being totally honest…the only time I hear from this individual is when that individual wants to do something. 80% of the time its what that person wants to do and its always a place that I would rather not be. Lets do this….want to eat….come here with me…sit here….do this…that…no this. It just all needs to STOP! It made me realize that this person has never called to say how was your day or whats going in your world. It’s always I want to do this and you have to come. Yet, when the world has smacked them in the face I am vowed to stop and woo-woo-woo them. NO! Well not anymore.
I am living as a convenience friend. Well only in this friendship. A person who is constantly there when it is beneficial for the other party. Although “convenience” can be defined so many ways, I chose to reference Urban Dictionary’s definition of “convenience friend”…..
A person who is only around when it is easy and convenient for them. They are the people who, if not placed around us, (ex. dorm rooms), all the time, they wouldn’t really be friends. They are usually used to do things for you, if you need a ride to and from school, etc. They are basically friends who need you around when they need a favor, or when they are just so bored out of their minds that they would rather hang out with you than sit around all day, but they’d never put you first.
Overall, you can’t give your all to someone who isn’t willing to do the same in return. The truth of the matter is, you can’t make people care about something they just don’t care about and that is the lack of care for ME. So as I received my pearl I wanted to pass it on, so that you too can be mesmerized by its beauty and richness. Stop sitting around waiting for others to be loyal or give a damn. They like the energy and vibe you bring to make them who they want to be. Detach and keep moving…when they move on that friend won’t be your friend anyway. They weren’t in the first place, so Bye bye homeboy!
mOOd: I’m a force by myself. I don’t need convenience.
SayWhatNOW?!?! 